Person in book: I'm not pretty. I'm average looking. People never really notice me.
Person in book: he's unattractive but has got beautiful eyes
Movie industry: no, we're hiring supermodels
demonsofslash: Plot twist: There is no third Hobbit movie. They cram the entire rest of the book into Desolation of Smaug, and they don’t tell anyone about it. So you sit in the theater for six hours, completely unprepared as the film just keeps going.
gendrybaratheon: If you’ve been following me since I first joined tumblr and watched my descent into too many fandoms to count but you’re still here reading this, you’re a trooper. Have this cupcake.
carpe natem: arkhams: REASONS WHY AQUAMAN DOESNT... →
arkhams: REASONS WHY AQUAMAN DOESNT SUCK AN ANGRY LIST BY TUMBLR USER ARKHAMS HE DOESNT JUST USE HIS TELEPATHY ON FISHES ONCE HE GAVE A GUY A SEIZURE BY JUST CONCENTRATING RLY HARD HIS WIFE IS A SUPERHERO TOO AND SHE IS F-A-B FAB HE CAN FUCKING TRAVEL THROUGH TIME AND SPACE CHARYBDIS…
snoipahkat: snoipahkat: fUCK IM OPENE D THE TOP KITCHEN CABINENT TO GET SOME GUM AND A FUCKIN BOOK STARTED TO FALL AND AS IT WAS FALLING I NOTICED IT HAD FUCKIN DR. PHIL ON THE COVER AND ALL I MANAGED TO SCREAM WAS NO DR PHIL BEFORE IT SMACKED ME REALLY HARD IN THE FACEW fucKGIN SMILING FUC K THIS SMUG BASTARD SHIT IS HARDCOVER
misplacedmartian: when someone changes the topic in a conversation and you had something interesting to say
vriksaserket: vriksaserket: i changed the settings on my moms phone so that when she types my name it changes to ‘my favorite child’ and when she types a swear, it changes it to something more family friendly
memyselfandhate: iamonlydorb: sucysucyfivedolla: the inside of your butt is warm enough to hardboil an egg oh no I’m not falling for this one again what
drayk: jikukan: I’M LAHUGING SO HARD AT THIS SHE DOESN’T EVEN JUMP SHE JUST LIFTS OFF THE GROUND
pizza: katherlne: can tumblr user pizza stop commenting on every post involving pizza tho yeah wtf how annoying is it
amazzingphil: [IT IS PERFECTLY OKAY TO LOVE A BAND’S MOST POPULAR SONG THERE IS A REASON IT IS THEIR MOST POPULAR SONG]
brassmama: Some people have these like fandom specific blogs and then there’s me:
shavingryansprivates: fun prank idea lay in bed for the rest of your life
bartimanus: wontonpoop: Pretty girls with long hair!! Stop cutting that shit off!! Boys don’t wanna date girls with boys haircuts!! Sorry!!
the-lonely-scottish-guy: ‘stop being overdramatic’ they say ‘i dont know what you mean’ i say as i descend from the ceiling, surrounded by mist
internetmessiah: Hello, 911? *twirls phone cord around finger* sooooo how was your day? Did you arrest any bad guys?…No you hang up first! Hello? 911?
veggietalesyaoi: if tumblrcon was a thing someone would literally get killed there im not even joking
high-functioningginger: The angel Gabriel said unto his fallen brother, Lucifer “Though thou art my brother and I love you well, thou art nothing but a sack of loins” And the fallen angel Lucifer was much enraged. Chuck 5:19